Hi February

Oh February, 

I remember last year this time being 100% different. 

I was really hopeful that our sweet Leonard would make me happy and come this month.  I would have been hilarious and amazing to have him on the 29th.  I was gifted with a birth that day, but not my own.  One of my best friends has her sweet baby boy on the 29th of February.  :) 

I was hopeful just for the fact that it would have been really fun and nice to have our kids birthdays be 4 months in a row. Amelia-December, Evelyn-January, Leonard-February, & Camden-March. That would have been a dream, cause hello, how cool would that have been!

Oh well, not all dreams can come true.  

Anyway, this month I am hopeful to be more deliberate in showing love to others. Friends and family. 

Especially to my dear husband.  

We haven't had the best relationship for the past year or two and it's mostly my fault.  I've been so bitter and angry about all sorts of different things, and have been taking it out on him. Its a simple case of, who can I take out my aggression on? you're the closest so I pick you. It's unfair and hurtful and I don't want to be bitter and angry.  I'm working on it, and I'm glad he hasn't left me in the dust, and hasn't given up on me. 

I love the life we have even though its far from normal or simple. Love sure is complicated, but worth the fight. 💗💗💗

I don't like airing out our dirty laundry.  It's not my style, but this is my year to be fearless, and not give a crap about what others may thing and for me to be brave is all areas of my life. 

I know I make my life seem like roses and unicorns but its not. oh well. 💁