Don't be a crotch watcher

You may be slightly confused by the title.  It's actually something that many of us do or have seen. Trust me.

Let me explain what I'm talking about.

If you drive, and have a cell phone chances are you are in fact a crotch watcher.  Now do you understand? No? Okay.

Picture this.

You're driving along and your phone lights up, you know not to look while driving, but you just take a peek, just to see. Pray there is a red light so you can stop and check the notification on your phone, what was it?! text, facebook, instagram, did someone finally tweet me?! You are anticipating the red light, you are already ever so slightly reaching for your phone. Finally red light! You grab your phone super psyched and then look down at it and smile. Me in the car next to you all i can tell is that you are smiling at your crotchel region and pray you are actually looking at your phone and not in fact smiling at your crotch. My favorite it as at night when they have a glowing crotch. hahahaha!!

I think we all know this.  I did a little experiment the last couple of days and i have to admit it was tough.

I put my phone on silent/vibrate shoved it in the bottom of my purse and tried desperately to forget about it.  The urge to grab my phone was intense y'all! INTENSE!  I found myself at a red light staring at my purse thinking, i wonder if i got a message, maybe someone needs me right this second!  I was fighting the urge to not look at my phone, and it won a couple of times (when i was driving alone), but i made it! For the most part, i was not a crotch watcher, and let me tell you, it feels phenomenal.

Next time you're driving and stopped at a light instead of grabbing your phone. Just take a quick look around you and see who is a crotch watcher.  Its crazy, the number of people out there.

I feel like the no text and driving movement should also include

"Don't watch your crotch, watch the road!"

It was nice not thinking about my phone while driving.  Yes, i missed a few calls, texts and such but i didn't worry about it.  I actually wrote this whole post out in my head while driving because i could! I was more aware of things around me and more focused on keeping my kiddos safe.  I was ready for anything that might be coming at me.

If you want to continue being a crotch watcher, don't be one while driving. Please for every life out there please do not look at your phone while driving.

I will continue with my NO CROTCH WATCH life and hopefully you'll join me too.

Happy safe driving everyone.

This concludes my PSA on safe driving practices.


  1. You're AMAZING!!! Hahah so hilarious

  2. OH EM GEE you are my favorite. And these gifs are phenomenal. Your gifs game is strong.

  3. Okay. This was absolutely hilarious! So, so true. Well executed with a great reminder that we should not be looking at our phones.

  4. Never thought to think of that, lol. I don't use my phone much in the car unless I am using the GPS. I will have to look around at others now. :)

  5. Yes!!! I am the worst about just taking a quick peek, but even that can be SO dangerous!!

  6. This should be turned into a televised psa. So clever! :) And not to mention, hilarious.


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